Dying to be Heard

Yesterday, I was back home and saw a movie with my youth group called "To Save A Life." (It's a good one. See it if you get the chance.) It's basically about teenage life and it focuses on one guy: how he lost his childhood best friend to suicide, how he accepted Jesus, and the events after his decision. It's very realistic because it shows that life doesn't become perfect after you decide to be a Christian... and there is good acting. (It's not one of those cheap, Christian movies).

The main theme/idea it hammers on is that there are people everywhere who feel lonely. (In the picture, it says under the main title "Some people are just dying to be heard").

The main character, Jake, loses his former best friend, Roger, at the beginning of the movie. Jake ended his friendship with Roger their freshman year of high school all for the sake of being accepted by the party crowd. Roger felt alone and worthless resulting in taking his life. The remainder of the movie is the unraveling of reasons Roger, like hundreds of teens, committed suicide.

It really hit home. Hard.

I was that person when I was fourteen. Ditched by my two only friends right before I started my freshman year of high school. I believe rejection is the most painful experience a person could go through. I understand how it is to feel so alone even when you're surrounded by hundreds of people. I often thought about just quitting life. I wondered who would show up to my funeral.

Jesus is good and delivered me from that state through a relationship with Him, but this really made me think and question how many people I see every day that feel the way I did. It's hard to tell sometimes. I know I had to master the art of appearing strong and independent. I hoped that when people looked at me, they would think, "Now she's got her act together." Nothing would have been further from the truth. I was a wreck.


Some studies show that university students are the loneliest people in a general population--even more than elderly and widowed people. This loneliness has a strong correlation to feelings of hopelessness. I found one study that states that these feelings of loneliness aren't caused by lack or frequency of social contacts, but rather the lack of satisfaction of those relationships. So whether you live on a high hill in a little hermit hut or on a college campus surrounded by people, even people who call you "friend," you can feel all alone and with out hope.

How many people are like that? Really. Just in your sphere of influence? One or two? A handful? It's a very sobering thought. Every other person you bypass on the way to class could have suicidal thoughts. They could have no hope for the future. This completely debunks the belief that no one is interested in talking to you. It gives a valid excuse to ignore feelings of awkwardness when striking up a conversation with someone you don't know. I think that even smiling can make a huge impact.

"Someone noticed me." That may not be their initial thought, but people truly want attention. We were made to communicate and to be in relationship with other humans.

My friend, Katie Oller, is convinced that everyone wants to know her. It sounds a little strange. (You might think she is really into herself if you don't know her). What she means is that people just want to know other people. I want to believe this, too.

How different would life be if we all believed that people just want to be noticed and valued?

It would be Heaven. That's what Heaven looks like. People really wanting to know people.